Our dog Murphy taste tests toys, beer, snacks and life in general.
Well, Mom threw out my Milkbone red fleece bunny. It lasted a little longer than a plush piggy, but not much. Then again, its also not as fun. However, if no piggies are available – I’ll take one of these please.
Milkbone Red Fleece Rabbit Ratings
Fun Factor: 4
Reliability: 3.5
Family Annoyance: 3.0
Clean-Up Factor: 3.0
Today Murphy discovered books! He’s not reading them so much as eating them. What a phase this boy seems to be going through. Now, I don’t remember if I left that book where he could get it OR if like the CD’s, he’s found a way to drag books off the shelf. In any case, I have admit that the boy has good taste! Bella Tuscany! Maybe once Murph makes the trip to Italy, he’ll be as much into wines as he is into beers. But one thing is for sure…Murphy loves to chew…anything and everything it seems these days.
–MM (Murphy’s Mom)
In the dog world of chewing Olympics, my boy Murphy is a Gold medal winner. This week his chewing adventures went in a new, very creative and mischievous direction.
Earlier in the week after returning from a business appointment, I discovered what at first looked like broken glass spread all over the downstairs carpet. Kind of scared me until I realized that it was the remant of the CD and it’s jewel case. Fortunately, he didn’t swallow anything cuz digesting that hard plastic would present a problem. Good grief, with all the toys that boy has why he now takes an interest in the CD collection I will never know.
Later that day Murph sneaked the television remote off the table when I walked out of the room for a moment…batteries spread all over the room were the clue that Murphy was up to something. There he was in the corner of the room happy as you please chewing on that remote.
The next day he managed to destroy several more CD’s and their jewel cases. Now I was kind of annoyed, although it is hard to be annoyed at a guy as cute as Murphy. Oh well. That’s probably what all Moms say. Anyway, back to our sneaky little dude.
This time I knew I didn’t leave anything on the floor. After getting the whole mess cleaned up and letting Murph know he was in trouble…the murphster has lost the privilege of getting to be out of his crate when I leave the house for short periods of time…I caught the little bugger walking up to the CD case nosing around at them. Then I figured it out. Mister intelligence apparently has learned how to pull things off a shelf when we wants to play with them. That took a little doing to maneuver them out of the cd case. Damn smart dog. Keeps me occupied.
Now it’s Saturday morning…as I blog both boys are downstairs napping. Shorty is in the dog house – literally – because he won’t stop acting up around the neighbor’s cats. I finally had to discipline him by putting him back in his crate for awhile. Interesting morning thus far. After letting the boys out at 4:30am, we all came back in to sleep. I thought. I figured the boys would probably drift back to sleep, I didn’t worry about putting Murphy back into his crate. Um, that was a mistake.
In the span of 2 short hours, our boy Murphy pulled the padding out of his brother’s crate. That wouldn’t have been so bad, except he decided to also remove the stuffing from the pad. Yup – foam rubber all over the family room when I came back down. Murphy, Murphy Murphy…
I’m told this is a phase that will probably last about 18 months. Let’s see so that’s only 11 more months to go:)
–MM (Murphy’s Mom)
That’s me on the bottle…
Oh wait, this is a beer and not a bottle of Jones Soda. Anyway, how cool is it to be on the bottle of beer? And it doesn’t taste bad either.
Blue Moon…
of Kentucky gonna keep on shining. This one’s pretty tasty too, but I think I like the Sam Adams Summer Ale better because it has less citrus taste.
Red Stripe Jamaican Lager
Ja mon – A taste of the islands. I don’t know if its the funky bottle shape or the Hotlanta weather. All I know is that these Red Stripes go down smooth and tasty. Grrrrrrrr.
Note my favorite piggy toy in the corner.
Samuel Adams Summer Ale
You are not seriously considering taking my beer away, are you? This stuff goes down better than water. Why can’t I have a lemon wedge too?
Well, I guess I haven’t had a piggy to destroy in a long time. This one is not lasting as long as the others, although it is trying to.
The next step in pig destruction is to remove all the stuffing and the squeaker. Trust me, this will annoy your parents, but they will think you are too cute to do anything about it.
Once the stuffing has been removed, you can easily remove an arm or leg. In the above example, I removed both arms.
So this is a good time to tell the piggy joke.
A man is driving down a lesser traveled road through rural Pennsylvania when his car breaks down. He gets out and starts walking back the road to an old farmhouse he saw a mile or two back. When he gets there, its getting dark and the farm family is about ready to have dinner. The farmer tells the man that he’ll be happy to help out after dinner and that the man should join his family for the meal.
They sit down at the table and the man looks to the end and there is this one legged pig sitting there waiting to be served. The man asks about the pig and the farmer tells him, “That pig is a hero. We had a fire here a few years ago and that pig woke the family up and dragged both kids out of the burning house. That pig will always have a seat at my table.”
The man asked, “Is that how the pig lost three of its legs? In the fire.”
To which the farmer responded, “Heck no son! You can’t eat a hero pig like that all at once.”
I chewed through another leash the other day. Why don’t they get that I do not want to be trained to do what they want? I’m the Murph and the world revolves around me! Anyway, Dad went to Petsmart to buy a new leash and lo and behold – there was a whole rackful of my favorite piggies.
We discovered these a few months ago, but then the supply had suddenly vanished and I thought I would be piggy-less forever. Not so, now I have a whole farmload of plush piggies to destroy. Yes, I will destroy them, but for some reason they seem to last longer than any other plush toys. And I still enjoy them even if they are missing stuffing, or arms, or eyes. Dad laughs cause it reminds him of an old pig joke that I might someday tell you. For now, I will say that you start with a piggy by chewing off its eyes and pulling out all the stuffing in the head.
Until then, here are my ratings on the piggies…
Plush Piggy Ratings
Fun Factor: 5
Reliability: 3.5
Family Annoyance: 3.0
Clean-Up Factor: 3.0
Murphy Mirth 
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